4 Steps to Loving Yourself

Loving one-self is such a powerful thing. It’s not always easy, it wasn’t for me. We live in an age where we are held to impossible standards. Not just women but men as well, no one not even fitness models are that lean and shredded 100% of the time. I think most of us know this but we still hold others, if not ourselves to these standards of beauty and success. I have been through many stages of indifference to flat out hating my body. I was never comfortable, when I was younger I was made fun of for being “too skinny”, then when I gained weight as my body matured I felt even more insecure, I made some poor choices in boys that intensified this insecurity. I wanted so bad just to be happy and love me, so here is what I did to do just that.

  1. Go find a private full length mirror. Undress to your comfort level. Now look at yourself, really look at yourself. List in your head or write down all the things you love about the way your body looks. Like I love my skin, my hair, my legs, my ankles, etc. Now list what you don’t like. Great, now that that is done move to step 2.

  2. Find a great support system. Find a person who loves you for you. It can be a friend, family member, or partner. Ask them what they love about you. It feels great to hear compliments. Also let them tell you and don’t down play what they say, because this is your person. This helps you see what other’s see, our vision of ourselves can be very skewed. Write it down.

  3. Now that you know what you don’t like what are you willing to do about it, ask yourself if it’s worth changing to you? If you hate your nose are you willing to go through the huge cost and care plan of surgery? What if your person loves your nose, does that change how you feel about it? What if you hate your stomach fat, are you willing to do what it takes and have the patience to persevere through the highs and lows of a fitness journey? If you are not willing to change something then stop worrying about it. Because if you truly hated it you would have all the motivation you needed to change it. Now ask yourself why you want to change that part of your body? If it is for someone else, for vanity reasons, stop, stop right there, you were not put here to please others. If it is for you or for someone else (health reasons) and you are willing to put in effort to change focus on those areas.

  4. Compare step 1 to step 2 and repeat step 3 if there is anything left. Now go back to the mirror and repeat after me, “I am amazing, I am worth it, I am loved, I have nothing to prove to anyone but me, I can do this, I am  beautiful” do this step every single day, every morning, every night if you need to until you believe it. Affirmations are an amazing tool so use them, add as many as you need, write them where you can see them daily if need be.

I will remind you this process isn’t easy and it may not be a quick, for me it wasn’t, though it is so, so, so worth it. You are an amazing human being that against all odd (seriously) you are alive and that my friend is a beautiful gift that shouldn’t be wasted.

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